Missing Pepper

[MVons]

It has been 8 weeks now and time does march on. The rainbow bridge sticky of course brought floods of tears. But the tears come less frequently now. I'm able to see photos of other corgis that remind me of Pepper but also tell me they are different dogs.

Neighborhood dogs have helped along with you all being on these forums. The neighborhood dogs run up for a petting and one walks me home from my son's school. They are able to sense "my need" to give a petting.

Our string of bad luck with vehicles after Pepper died maybe was to get my mind off our loss. The dog food scare occurred after Pepper had kidney problems so that didn't cause more stress.

Now that the litter of puppies that we are going to get one from has arrived, we are excited. I did need at least two months for mourning before getting another dog. Also a vacation last week, helped me relax and appreciate life, even with the ups and downs.

The ups and downs would have been easier with Pepper here, but she went to the bridge, happy again instead of being in pain. She will always be missed and special to my husband who was unemployed and home when she was a puppy. For me it was her senior years and I was then at home. If she saw me crying, she would come and lick my face. Who could ask for anything more? She trained us to not yell, because she would hide. And they say dogs need training, well after they are trained, they do the training.

We get a new dog in honor of Pepper, because she was so great we want another dog.

Pepper 9/9/91 - 2/12/07 so blessed for all those years, even though we hoped for more.

Merrie

[MrsGrace]

Merrie,

What a wonderful tribute to your sweetheart Pepper. Thank you for sharing that with us all and know that we are here for you and understand the pain of loss all to well, even though such a loss is deeply personal.

***BIG HUGS***

Grace

[Fluffypants]

That was beautiful Merrie. And Pepper was obviously very happy with you - she stuck around for 16 years! I know your new arrival will be just as loved and well cared for as Pepper was. <<<<<Merrie>>>>>

[Dillydoodle]

Merrie,
That was a beautiful tribute to your special girl. I do believe in the rainbow bridge with all my heart. Pepper had a long life filled with love and I know she is terribly missed.

Emilie

[corgimom]

Merrie,

Thank you for sharing your personal story about Pepper. It is often hard sometimes for close family members to understand our grief(I found that in my case to be true) Here you have people that have gone through the same thing and understand how hard it is.

[darci]

Thanks for sharing Pepper with us.
It's so hard to loose our pets, they are so much our family.

[ZdogZ]

Merrie ~ That was beautiful! Pepper was very lucky to have you, and vice versa. Your new puppy will help heal your broken hearts without replacing Pepper.

[ColColt]

Bless your heart, Merrie. I just saw this this morning and know how you must be feeling. Time is a great healer but, it will never wipe away the memories of those precious times spent with our loved ones. Many Corgi kisses to Pepper from Katie as they romp the green fields of Rainbow Bridge together.

[herdingdogs]

What a wonderful tribute to Pepper. A special dog who was well loved and will never be forgotten.

Hugs,
Linda

[MVons]

Are you ready for the unusual...when I did my first posting of Pepper on another site, I posted two days after Pepper's Feb 12 death but I listed the death as April 12. That was the due date of my replacement puppy that I didn't know about until March!

Here is the portion of the posting of Pepper's life:

Pepper, a cardigan welsh corgi born Sept 8, 1991 - died Feb 12, 2007. My daily companion for 11 years when I got to be a stay at home mom. My husband's companion for the prior 4 years when he was in school and/or out of work.

It started when my husband was unemployed and bored and we had been married a year. I knew getting a puppy would hone our parenting skills for having child! We answered an ad in the paper (days before the internet) and chose the pet quality tri with brindle tips and a tiny white stripe up the nose instead of the common wide stripe. She was the puppy picked on by her siblings so we knew she wasn't aggressive. She was so smart, my husband caught her using her nose to flip the gate hook latch finding how she got into our landlord's yard (grass is always greener). She learned to howl from my in-laws basset and would howl when we left the house in her later years.

We worked on her fears exposing her to frightening things like a "leaf" off a palm tree lying on the ground - quite scary looking. My favorite memory was because she was cautious around cats - the first one she encountered tried to swipe her but her reflexes saved her nose - she crept up to a garage to sniff a cat. The cat was a silhouette black wood cutout. I was laughing so hard as she took a quick sniff and found no smell. When an overly friendly cat at a new neighborhood rubbed her, she didn't know what was going on. She gently went after a cat to sniff, or chased one, but when the cat turned around and stood it's ground, she backed off and went away apologetically.

Memories of exercising on the floor when I was pregnant and Pepper sat between my legs to give me a lick as I reached for my toes each time. She was 4 when our son was born. She was great with him and would run over to me and give me the look when he cried of "are you going to take care of him?" When our son was 4 they "fought". I'd be on the phone and have to turn and tell them to knock it off and my friends would swear I had two kids. Pepper would trip our son as he ran by, because you know Corgi's like to win running races. Our first home had a loop and we had so much fun running the loop or doubling back trying to catch her. Our son learned to be gentle with Pepper and Pepper learned she was not the pack leader over our son. Neither did I really worry about because Pepper never bit anyone and our son was mild mannered child. When I was ill and tired, she was by my side and wasn't jealous of my son's need for extra care as he worried about me. I am fine now.

We moved to our present home in the rural mountains when Pepper was 10. She was so confused with the squirrels here that ran up a tree instead of a hole in the ground. She was how we met our neighbors. Running off to them full speed and we weren't used to the altitude so we lagged behind.

After 6 months living here, we saw a bold coyote who didn't flinch when he saw us, unlike the city ones. We kept Pepper on a leash unless we could give her total attention outside. As Pepper aged, she loved sleeping on the deck with the sun hitting her. Being black she'd last 5 minutes in the summer before needing to cool off. She loved the day she could lay on the snow and have the sun hit her. The best of both worlds, cool and hot.

At 13 she had a herniated disc. I was able to keep her immobile in her bed, far more comfortable than a Vet's cage. We believe she jumped off a chair. She became a more crotchety old bitch. Feisty if a male sniffed too closely, no longer passive. I became her elevator. I'll be darn if she had no limp when visiting the Vet and the Vet gave me the look that she has me trained! She was a determined dog who took 1 1/2 mile walks for a year after.

When she was 14 1/2 she was stiff after a walk and we shortened the walks. Then she got too slow to make it on the walk to school and she napped more. We noticed she started to drink more water but had no other symptoms. In Jan. she vomited and seemed to have trouble eating. I got her into the vet on Jan 10 and one sniff of her mouth, he suspected kidney failure. The Vet thought she'd die within a week as her blood results were so bad. We were to bring her in when she stopped eating.

She gradually got slower in movement. I'll never forget her last trip around the block with a steep hill. It took 30 minutes (usually 10 minutes) but I had all the time in the world for her. She was so determined and proud to do that walk. She never paused, or panted. I was so blessed it was a cold month and she didn't have thirst from it being too warm.

We always said when she stopped eating we knew she was ready to die. We realized, she never would stop eating, but food went through her in two hours on the last day. She was starting to not make it through the night without wetting her crate.

She was such a good dog on house training. She never scratched or barked at the door. She came over to us and looked, and we knew to get up and let her out. She knew the panic sound in my voice, meant she better return - she sailed past me chasing an old raccoon. I had visions of the smart raccoon turning around and nailing the dog. But Pepper stopped when she heard my panic and returned. After all she was just defending our home from that strange looking critter.

Having the month from the bad news from the Vet until she died, gave us the luxury of getting used to the knowledge she would be dying. We are fortunate. I was lucky to have the time to care for her. Her activities and abilities had decreased so much, knowing she wasn't how she used to be help send her along to heaven.

Looking forward to a puppy in the summer with the wonderful energy that we miss, helps ease the pain of the loss.

Merrie

[Jespah]

Dear Merrie,

I'm so glad you posted your story of Pepper. In a few short paragraphs I feel as if I knew her. She obviously lived a good long life filled with love and Corgi fun. They do become our family members and it is so painful when they are gone. I know after losing my girl Riley last summer, that it is because of her that I have another Corgi, Jemma, and that honours Riley's life.

Pepper's life will be truly honoured when you get your pup and take everything you learned from Pepper and give it a wonderful life too.

Deb

[bunnybutts]

I feel like I now know Pepper too.... what a wonderful tribute to your lives together....

She has left your heart open to love again...what legacy could be more fitting than that.

[Dillydoodle]

The relationship we have with our furbabies often is so deep and so very special and reading about your loving bond with Pepper, makes me tear up thinking about how special the memories are to you and thinking about my own losses and how much each furry has touched my life and how much they have helped me each in their own way to teach me to be a better "mom"... Thank you for sharing, now i gotta run and grab some kleenex.

Emilie

[Merlincorgi]

What a wonderful tribute to Pepper and her life with you. She had an amazing life with your family and she is without a doubt waiting for you at the Bridge. Beautiful soul.

[LaRositaMonita]

Thanks for the touching story about Pepper, Merrie. Truly, she was a great dog I wish I had had the opportunity to know...and what a great owner she had in you.

I know Colin and I feel almost the same way about our upcoming addition to the household...we are still waiting to have another "great dog" like the ones we each grew up with. They were both labs. Colin's dog, Hogan, passed away during his senior year of high school; Mitzie, my childhood pet, passed away a year and a half ago during my semester of student teaching. It has been a long time, I think, since either of us cried like we did on the days we lost our favorite family members. My parents have yet to feel like they're ready for another dog; Colin's parents took to getting Jack Russells, which neither Col nor I like much. We are ready to love Mac for as long as he's ready to let us have him in our lives...and we can't wait until he can meet his Internet friends who are also going home to their families this summer!

[MVons]

I finally developed my roll of film

This is Pepper with her paw around the down slipper that is usually her pillow. It was a rare moment where she was really asleep.
http://i191.photobucket.com/albums/z47/mvons/Pepper/Peppersleep.jpg

The last photo of her standing, coming back in after doing her business.
http://i191.photobucket.com/albums/z47/mvons/Pepper/Pepinyard.jpg

She was an amazing 15 yr old.

Merrie

[Jespah]

What a sweet looking girl Merrie, you were so lucky to have had her for so long, but I know that's what makes having lost her so hard. I'm glad you posted her photos so she can be here with us.

Deb

[LaRositaMonita]

What a sweet girl....her expression reminds me of Mitzie. I'm sure they're playing together now, just waiting :)

[Dillydoodle]

aww merrie, she really looks so sweet holding her little slipper as a pillow... she has a very sweet face and i know how much you must be missing her... It took me a long time to look at the last photos of Clinton, and truth be told, i still cry when i look at them... So glad you shared those photos of your girl with us...

Emilie

[MissGambler's+Mojo'sMommy]

I second the thanks for sharing, what a beautiful dog, and so sweet looking. We are certainly blessed with their presence in our lives.

[sutulu]

Merrie:

Wow, Peper was quite a dog! I hope I am blessed with that amount of time with my two.

I often look at them and wonder what they will be like at age 13 or so? Watching her grow from a pup, adapt to your son, adapt to your new home, and finally her last weeks. It must give you a wonderful perspective on life.

She will always be in your heart.

Susan

[Lauren]

It always seems too soon when our beloved pets leave us but she'll remain in your heart, waiting for the day when you will see each other again. She looks like such a sweet girl, like others have said thank you for sharing her with us.

[ZdogZ]

Thanks for sharing the photos. Pepper was really a cutie.

[Penutsma]

It has taken me three times reading this post. I loved the story you posted on the other site and then shared with us. I too had a beloved pet that has gone on to the Rainbow Bridge. I can finally think of her and not cry, but cannot look at her pictures yet! She died 1 week before Mother's Day - last year. Do I become attached to my furbabies!? :CUTE:

I think the only reason I can now think about her without crying is because of Delilah (and now Bugsy!). The empty spot in my heart is slowly closing and I should be able to look at Jasmine's pictures someday soon without feeling that horrible ache.

Anyway, thank you for sharing your story about Pepper. It really touched a deep spot inside.

[Shelly]

Thank you for telling us of Pepper. She had a good life with you. Broken hearts do eventually heal, it all takes time. Take the time to mourn her. It's a tribute to the love you shared that you can't replace her so easily. My sympathies to you and your husband on her loss. Just because Pepper is gone from sight doesn't mean you can't continue loving her.

[MVons]

My husband reminded me that tomorrow is the anniversary of Pepper's death. Erec and I actually had forgotten. In reading through this thread of course the tears flood, but how comforting to look down on Chester curled up beside me. I didn't know why I didn't take him up to bed his usual time. I guess I needed his presence beside me.

It wasn't until this calendar year that I've bonded with Chester. Oh he is a special boy, but it took time to steadily work into my heart. I can't imagine life without having a dog. If I'm 80, I'll get a senior dog to share my aches and pains. Chester keeps me going as I am over the middle in age. His love of walks keeps me from being a couch potato. It is wonderful to have Chester be so special to me now. I can see Pepper smiling down on me, glad her owner is happy.

[MissGambler's+Mojo'sMommy]

Thankfully, I'm a firm believer that a good cry is healthy. Yes, Pepper is smiling at you, he only left you in the physical sense.

[LaRositaMonita]

I can see Pepper smiling down on me, glad her owner is happy.

The best part is she's smiling down on you with so many others at her side - Deb's Riley, my childhood lab Mitzie, and all the other C2BC dogs who have gone to the ridge over the years.

[Jespah]

I know how you feel Merrie, they never leave our hearts and they watch over us. It took me a long time to bond with Jemma too, and I felt badly for her. She is a very happy bubbly dog, so she was okay with that and now I am making up the time with her.

I also will always have a dog as a companion - along with a couple of cats. But dogs get us out in the world and off the couch as you said.

[CorgiMum]

I'm sure that Pepper has met and played with our Thomas too Merrie. I also had a hard time bonding with Dylan at first, but in time I've found that each bond is just as close. I cannot imagine my life without dogs, I hope that I am forever blessed to have at least one.

[ZdogZ]

Thinking of you today. I know that you are blessed with many memories of Pepper.